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跨国婚姻的生活戏剧
作者:wangdacheng
来源:未名交友
爱在口头或爱在心头(一)
Preface
序
“The spring is coming, the earth is smiling…” the hall
was resounding to the strains of Strauss’ joyful waltz while the
foreign groom and his local bride were tripping away in a dance.
At the climax of the music they swirled so quickly that both of
them felt swooning in the glamour of their cross-border marriage.
If their cross-border love is like a beautiful fairy tale, unusual
and romantic, their subsequent marriage life is a real world, where
there are constant conflicts between the civilisation of the Mediterranean
and that of the Yellow River, between reason and passion, bread
and rice, smelly cheese and strong-smelling bean curd, beefsteak
and pig’s feet. Thus in this Sino-Western family a series of theatrical
acts, sometimes happy, sometimes unhappy, sometimes even comic,
follow each other.
“春天来了, 大地在欢笑” 斯特劳斯欢快的圆舞曲在大厅里响起,老外新郎和当地新娘翩翩起舞.舞曲到达高潮,他俩飞速旋转并同时醉倒在异国恋的奇光异彩中.如果说新郎新娘的异国恋象一个美丽的童话,
既神奇又浪漫; 那么随之而来的跨国婚姻生活却是一个童话外的现实世界. 在这个世界里, 地中海文化和黄河文化、理性和人情、面包和米饭、
臭奶酪和臭豆腐、牛排和猪蹄势不两立并展开了一场场旷日持久的拉锯战. 从而也就在这个中西家庭里导致出一幕幕时而欢快、时而伤心、时而甚至具有喜剧色彩的生活戏剧.
Love in the mouth or love in the heart:
爱在口头或爱在心头 (1)
Newly married, and as a foreign husband, I happily enjoy
cross-border family life with my local bride. Even though having
lived in Europe for a long time, but influenced by my Chinese culture,
I behave as a typical Chinese husband, hardworking, but somewhat
introverted and word shy, while my wife resembles to a happy magpie,
frank, outspoken, chattering and lively. Already at dawn she starts
her love chirp and wakes me up by “I love you”, I am first astonished,
then touched and at the end feel happy. In the evening, when I come
back home, my little “magpie” merrily jumps up, arms around my neck,
covers my yellow face with kisses and fills my ear with her pet
phrase “I love you”. I am fascinated by her outspoken declaration
of love, but unfortunately too shy to declare my own in words. However
my love for her is embodied in actions rather than in speech. She
works far from our home and is often tired after her daily journey
from work. I always take the initiative in doing housework; washing,
cleaning, gardening, to relieve her from these burdens; I comb her
hair, give her face a massage to comfort her. She tacitly understands
my gesture and never forgets, making sheep’s eyes and filling my
ear with “I love you”.
燕尔新婚, 我这位老外新郎和当地的土新娘把小日子过得有滋有味. 尽管我在欧洲生活很久, 但因受中国文化的影响太深,
我的一举一动自然象一位典型的中国丈夫, 我任劳任怨,内向且不善言辞. 而她却象只喜雀, 心直口快, 叽叽嘁嘁、欢蹦乱跳. 黎明晨曦初露,“喜雀”啁啾鸣唱,用“我爱你”的声音把我吵醒,我初一楞,随后就是一阵激动和幸福无比.晚上下班回家,“小喜雀”准会欢天喜地地扑上老公的脖子,对着其老黄脸就是一阵猛咂,并同时在我耳边鸣唱:“我爱你!”她那坦率的爱情宣言让我神魂颠倒,但不幸的是我却羞于用嘴如法炮制.尽管爱字难于出口,但我却把爱落实在实际行动中.妻子上班路途遥远,下班后往往疲惫不堪,我总是主动包揽家务活,以减轻她的负担:
洗衣洗碗,打扫卫生,花园锄草.我也会为她梳头或给她做脸部按摸,让她得到放松.她心领神会,眉目传情,决忘不了在我的耳际频频鸣唱:
“我爱你!”.
The newlyweds’ life is romantic and sweet. However,
as time passes, her daily love song has evolved from high pitch
to low pitch, from one-eight times to one-half time. One day, she
looked concerned and distracted, her big eyes fixed on my mouth:
obviously she was looking for something, maybe some “love vitamins”.
Not a complete fool, I felt I had to do something and I kept bombing
her with kisses, but surprisingly she still looked dejected. “Darling,
are you ill?” I felt worried and puzzled. “Do you still love me?”
she suddenly asked an unexpected question. “Yes, of course!” I was
thunderstruck. “But why don’t you say so?” “A man loves through
his actions, but not through his mouth!” I replied with haste. “Not
enough! It is very important to express your love using words also!
If you love me, you should declare it right now. Say to me loudly
- I love you ”. In front of my little “magpie”, her eyes full of
hope, I had no alternative but to untie my tongue and mumble out
“I love you” – one of the most difficult phrases in the world for
the Chinese generation having grown up in the sunshine of Mao, and
this with great effort! “Not enough, your voice is too weak. And
your declaration is not from the bottom of your heart. Repeat, please!”.
Brimming with tears, she looked deeply unhappy. “I, I, I love you!”
Blushing with embarrassment, I finally stammered out the popular
pet phrase, with which all Westerners are so familiar. Seeing me
in an awkward position, my intransigent wife finally softened and
dispensed me from saying it again. However as a middle school teacher,
she reluctantly gave me a pass, just as she did to her mediocre
students.
新婚的日子浪漫而蜜甜.不过随着时间的推移,媳妇的爱情鸣唱渐渐地由高八度变成了低八度,由八分之一拍变成了二分之一拍.有一天,她显得心神不定,若有所失,一对大眼睛眼巴巴地望着大丈夫的嘴巴,显然她在“寻寻觅觅”,莫不是在寻找“爱情维他命”.本大丈夫并不是一个不可救药的糊涂虫,我觉得应该做点什么,于是就随即搂着她的脸狂轰炸.奇怪的是她仍旧萎靡不振.“亲爱的,你哪不舒服?”我感到有些不安和莫名其妙.“你爱我吗?”她忽然提出一个我始料未及的问题.
“当然爱!” “那你为什么不口头向我表示?” “男子汉爱在行动,不在口头!”我赶紧回答. “不行, 口头表示你的爱非常重要! 既然你爱我,
你现在就应该从口里说出来.请你对我大声说一句“我爱你”. 望着小喜雀那期盼的大眼睛, 我只得列开大嘴,费劲地嗫嚅出一句“我爱你”-
对于在毛泽东的阳关雨露下长大的那一代人来说,说出这句简单的话语无疑比愚公移山还难. “不行, 你的声音太低,跟本就没有发自内心.重说一遍!”她泪眼汪汪,显得十分不快.“我,我,我爱你!”我胀红了脸,结结巴巴地吐出西方人熟悉的口头禅.看到我那狼狈不堪的样子,我那毫不妥协的妻子终于高抬贵手放过老公.不过,当老师的她象给自己的劣等生打分那样,只勉强给我打了个六十分的及格成绩.
爱在口头或爱在心头 (二)
Love in the mouth or love in the heart:
爱在口头或爱在心头 (2)
Having been one of the best students in school and in university,
I was not at all satisfied with the low mark. Bad in the oral test,
I wished to gain a good note at least in the written examination!
One day, I went on a business trip to Germany, and thus got a good
opportunity to take a written test. I was certainly not willing
to let it slip through my fingers. As soon as I arrived, I let my
pen have its way: “My darling, since I left you, your voice, as
melodious as a song, as clear as a bell, is flowing into my ears,
just as the sound of a murmuring stream flows gently and slowly
into my heart. I am enchanted. Your beautiful silhouette, just like
a landscape painting, touches me so deeply…” Unexpectedly, my letter,
even though expressing my love indirectly, gave me a high mark,
as it was quickly echoed by a emotional Western style reply from
my wife: “My darling, thank you for your letter. I love your looking
at me so tenderly, I love your caressing me, I love your consoling
me, I love the tiny wrinkles in the corner of your eyes, I love
your exotic accent, I love your tender feelings, I love you!”
无论在中学还是在大学,我在学习上总是名列前茅,好学生岂能仅仅满足于她给我打的低分? 口试不行,总得笔试跟上.有一天我到德国出差,终于得来了一个难得的笔试机会.
“机不可失,失不再来.”一到目的地,我就大笔一挥,龙飞凤舞. “亲爱的,自从离开你的那一刻起,你那脆如银铃,悠悠如歌的声音就在我的耳畔流淌不息,犹如山涧里的潺潺流水,流入心田并让我心醉.你那美丽的倩影,犹如一幅的山水画,让我心动……”
想不到我那闪烁其辞的情书居然让我得了高分,因为很快我就收到她那滚烫的欧式回函:“我的爱,谢谢你的来鸿.我爱你温情地看着我, 我爱你把我紧紧搂在怀里,我爱你让我得到宽慰,我爱你眼角边的小皱纹,我爱你的异国语调,我爱你的温柔,我爱你
!”
One week later, with boundless joy and impatient to
experience the burning love expressed in her comments, I came back
home. But unexpectedly she didn’t cheerfully jump up, arms around
my neck as usual. “Darling, how about my written test?” I had to
take initiative to ask the question. “Yes, this time the mark of
your written test is quite high, but you never rang me this week,
therefore the mark of your oral one is zero! If I average out both
your written and oral marks, your total is below the level of pass”.
She stared at her stupefied husband. Tears came to her eyes and
swept him away like a flood. “Oh no! I’ve disappointed her again,
but…?” I tried to survive her “flood” and explained: “My darling,
as soon as I’d arrived in the hotel, I wrote a love letter to you.
You know, you are very important in my heart.” “Fool! Why didn’t
you phone me everyday and say straightaway that you love me?” Thank
goodness, I had completely forgotten that there was a daily oral
test. What a sad experience from which a Chinese husband should
draw an important lesson! I finally realized that I should not only
keep my love for her in my writing, in my eyes and in my actions,
but also clearly declare it in a loud voice and at least once per
day!
一星期后我欢天喜地地踏进家门,迫不及待地准备具体品尝一下妻子评语里那滚烫的爱.但出乎意料的是这次她没有跳到我的脖子上.
“夫人, 我的书面考试怎么样?”我只好主动提问. “这次你的笔试单科成绩很高, 但你这一周都没有给我打电话, 所以你的口试成绩为零分.如果把你的笔试和口试分一平均,
总成绩不及格.”她注视着惊呆了的丈夫, 泪水象山洪爆发,把他冲得无影无踪.“不可能吧!我又辜负了妻子的希望? 但是……?”我力图从洪水中死里逃生并竭力解释:“亲爱的,
我一到旅馆就给你写下爱情短篇, 可见你在我心中是多么重要!”“傻瓜, 那你为什么不每天给我打个电话并简单地说声我爱你?”天啦,我居然忘了每天还有一个口试科目!痛定思痛,中国大丈夫可得吸取教训!我现在终于明白,对妻子的爱不能仅仅停留在笔头上、眼神中、行动里,还必须通过大白话的方式高声表达出来,而且要每天一次!
“Even though my clothes have become loose, I don’t regret
it; for you, I have become wan and sallow”, this popular ancient
Chinese verse is intended to express tender feelings towards you.
Such an indirect way to express love is poetic and well appreciated
in an Asian cultural environment, but may be considered insufficient
on its own in a European cultural environment. On the contrary,
a simple and straightforward love declaration such as “I love you”
turns out to be essential, just as daily bread is essential to a
European, but seems as insipid as a cup of hot water in an Asian
cultural environment where tea is more appreciated.
“衣带渐宽终不悔,为君消得人憔悴”,这是中国人表达爱情的古老名诗句.这样的间接表达方式在亚洲的文化环境中诗意盎然,倍受亲睐,但到了欧洲文化环境里就可能显得远远不够.相反,象“我爱你”这样的大白话表达方式在欧洲文化环境里显得至关重要,犹如欧洲人日日必食的面包;
但在亚洲茶文化的环境中却显得淡而无味,犹如一杯滚烫的白开水.
“When in Rome do as the Romans do.” From then on, as
a foreign husband, I started to imitate my local wife. She patiently
taught me and finally succeeded in turning an Asian husband shy
of words into a Western “glib talker”. If ever dark clouds enshroud
her face, I let the magic phrase jump from my mouth, then they immediately
disperse; if she feels tired and nervous, I say it and she instantly
feels relaxed, beaming with smiles. When the curtain of night falls,
I use again this magic formula, she then treats me to a romantic
and special night. “ILY” is simple, all embracing, indispensable
and a panacea capable of curing all family problems. Whether you
believe it or not, it is certainly worthwhile taking the trouble
to try it.
“入乡随俗”,从此以后我这位老外丈夫也开始东施效颦. 妻子循循善诱,连教带帮,终于把一位羞于言辞的亚洲丈夫变成了一位“油嘴猾舌”的西方丈夫.如果妻子的脸上乌云密布,我会冷不防地冒出一句“我爱你”,随即她的脸就云开日出;如果妻子劳累不堪,心烦意乱,我就又会冒出一句“我爱你”,随即她就精神大震,笑逐颜开.当夜幕降临时,我又再次使用这个奇妙的套话,她就会给大丈夫一个最浪漫最特殊的夜晚.“我爱你”三个字,言简意赅,包罗万象,必不可少,
犹如灵丹妙药,包治家庭百病.信不信由您,不过实在值得一试.
Confrontation between Chinese food and Western food
中西餐对垒(一)
As a husband who remains irremediably Chinese, I enjoy
eating Chinese food and in particular cooking Chinese food. Even
as a student during my early days in Europe, I had enjoyed performing
my “percussion concert” with pans, bowls, spoons and tubs in my
tiny studio and used to invite a band of hard-up Chinese students
to share my “masterpiece”. However, my wife, good at French cooking
and furthermore keen to keep a high standard of hygiene in our house,
categorically dismissed my efforts as a Chinese chef, who stir-fried
everything, and thus was a big consumer of oil and a big source
of pollution.
我这个无可救药的中国丈夫喜欢吃中餐,更乐于挽袖下厨.在从前当留学生的日子里自己就喜欢在陋室里玩锅碗,弄瓢盆,演奏个人打击乐音乐会,并常常请一帮穷留学生与自己有福同享.不过妻子也是厨房高手并且酷爱室内清洁卫生.可是中国庖丁总是喜欢什么都油煎油爆,
是一个标准的大油耗子和大污染源,因此妻子根本不理会中国庖丁的一相情愿并请其下岗.
One day, however, the chef, out of work, could not help
asking her to step down to make room for him: “My darling, today,
I really want to prepare some Chinese food, a Sichuan speciality
for us to feast upon. Could you please lend me the kitchen? “No
problem, but don’t make too much greasy dirt.” My wife, used at
cooking in pure water, was excited, but a little bit worried. I
shut the door and as a cook began to play happily and loudly with
the cooking utensils and dance around the oven. The menu being fixed
one week earlier, I just needed to follow the cooking procedure
in an unruffled way. Very soon, the strong smell of Sichuan delicacies
spread all over the house and I appeared with the first course of
savouries “Do, Re, Mi, Fa, So” - several cold dishes: a preserved
eggs dressed with coriander, pig’s ear covered in pepper, Sichuan
style pickles. “Come on, Darling! ” I proudly called out.
有一天,下岗师傅终于忍不住请妻子让贤.“亲爱的,我今天准备做一桌地道的川菜,让咱们一饱口福.麻烦你把厨房腾给我好吧!”“没问题!不过油烟不要太大.”习惯于清水煮菜的夫人对我叮嘱道,显得有些兴奋,也有些担心.我这位厨师关好厨房门,然后就在里面兴高采烈丁铃咣啷地演奏起锅碗瓢盆打击乐并跳起了锅边舞.我的菜谱早在一周前就已经订好,自然无论演奏还是跳舞我都显得不慌不忙.很快浓烈的川菜香弥漫房里屋外.大厨终于谢幕露面,径直端出第一道香喷喷的“哆来咪发嗦”来,
即几盘凉菜: 撒满香菜的松花皮蛋、撒满辣椒面的凉拌猪耳朵丝、四川泡酸菜.“快来, 亲爱的!”我得意洋洋地大呼开饭.
Dressed in a read cheongsam to harmonize with the chef’s
masterpiece, my lovely wife came with deliberate steps into the
dinning room. “What’s this?” She asked doubtfully, pointing at the
black egg on the plate. “This is a Chinese speciality, Songhuadan.
In fact it is a hen’s egg, preserved in a mixture of water, lime,
clay, salt and rice husks, with pine needle-shaped veins (songhua)
running through the egg whites, hence the name Songhua; in Europe
it is also called the egg of one hundred years. It is a real delicacy.
Taste it.” Seeing her hesitating, I brought a piece of Songhuadan
up to her mouth. “Horrible! Why is it so smelly?” she frowned, nearly
vomiting it up. “My darling, it is delicious! Why do you find it
disgusting?” I was puzzled. Seeing dark clouds cover her face, I
hastened to resort to the usual panacea: “I love you”. The magic
remedy produced the desired result: the clouds dispersed and her
face was brightened again by sunshine. However she resolutely refused
to venture a further bite.
为了配合中国大厨的杰作,我那可爱的妻子特意穿上了中国旗袍. 她迈着小粹步,款款来到饭厅.“这是什么?”妻子指着盘里的黑东西,满腹疑问.“这是我们中国的特产,松花皮蛋,其实它是鸡蛋,用水、混合石灰、黏土、食盐、稻壳包制而成.因蛋青上有像松针的花纹,
所以叫松花蛋, 在欧洲也被称为百年蛋. 它其香无比. 请尝尝!” 看到妻子犹豫不决的样子, 我亲自把一牙皮蛋送到了她的嘴边.“真可怕!
这黑鸡蛋怎么这么臭?”她眉头紧锁,差一点儿就要吐出来. “亲爱的,我吃起来真香!你怎么会觉得它恶心?”我大惑不解.看着她那乌云密布的脸,我赶紧使用灵丹妙药
-“我爱你!”. 神药起了作用. 只见她脸上随即云开日出. 不过她决不愿意再冒险咬上一口.
“Please taste this Sichuan style pickle. I made it myself.
Wow, it is really appetizing!” With my chopsticks, I put a radish
pickle into her mouth! “ My god, too sour!” She shivered and gritted
her teeth. “Come on, please taste this delicacy! In the seventies
we could afford it only during the Chinese New Year. It is as good
as the French speciality: duck liver pate.” I could not stop myself
suggesting the traditional Chinese New Year dish. Eagerly, I put
one slice in front of her mouth. “What’s this?” She became more
vigilant. “Pig’s ear!” “My goodness! Do you really eat pig’s ear?”
She closed her eyes, frightened, as if she had fallen into the hands
of cannibals.
“尝尝四川泡菜吧!这可是我自己泡出来的.啊,真开胃!”我又用筷子把一块泡箩卜押到她口里.“哇,老天爷,
真酸!”夫人打了个寒颤,咬紧牙关.“来来来,再尝尝这个好东西. 在中国七十年代, 我们只有在春节时才能吃到.它的味道决不比你们法国特产鹅肝酱差!”我锲而不舍,
非要坚持请她饱口福. 我急切地把一小条猪耳朵送到了她嘴前.“这到底是什么?”她警惕起来.“猪耳朵.” “我的妈呀!你真吃猪耳朵?”她紧闭双眼,惊恐万状,
象是自己落入食肉生番的手里.
“My darling, don’t panic, the best dishes will be following.”
I brought out a plate of piping hot bean curd, a plate of Yuxiang
pork thread and a plate of pig’s feet braised in soy sauce. “ The
spicy Mapo bean curd is a Sichuan speciality, please try it!” While
urging her, I put it on her plate. Waving her knife and fork, whoops,
she smashed it to pieces, crushing it to pulp. “Oh no, I can’t feel
my tongue anymore!” She cried, panic-stricken. “Don’t worry. The
Sichuan pungent and prickly ash in the Mapo bean curd is disinfecting
your tongue!” I remained calm and showed her another dish. “Come
on, please try a little bit of Yuxiang pork thread, it is my masterpiece:
a special number!” I quickly served a heaped spoonful of red pork
thread. “My month is on fire, please put it out!” Tears falling
like rain, she asked for help. Seeing her suffering, I immediately
brought a spoonful of rice to her burning mouth. The fire was finally
extinguished, but she was still a blushing beauty in tears. “Darling,
I’m very sorry, but Sichuan food is known for its hot and pungent
taste. I have put pepper and Chinese prickly ash in it. You know,
I want to make it as spicy as our love! Anyhow, I will not continue
to cook in the same way!”
“亲爱的,不要怕,好菜都在后头.”我迅速端出一盘热气腾腾的豆腐、一盘鱼香肉丝和一盘红烧猪蹄.“麻婆豆腐是四川特色菜,请尝尝!”我一边劝,一边把特色菜挑到她盘里.夫人刀叉齐下,把豆腐杀了个粉身碎骨.“哎呀,我的舌头怎么没啦?”
她大声惊呼. “不要慌, 麻婆豆腐里的川椒正在给你的舌头消毒!” 我镇静自若并指着另一道菜.“来,再来点鱼香肉丝.这也是我的杰作,我的拿手好戏.”
我把满满一勺红红的肉丝塞进了她的嘴里. “我的妈呀.我嘴中起火!亲爱的,快快扑火!” 妻子流眼抹泪, 拼命求救.我一看情况不妙,赶紧把一勺勺的白米饭塞进她喷火的嘴里.火终于扑灭,但妻子仍成了面红耳赤的泪美人.
“亲爱的,真对不起.但四川菜以麻辣为特色,我在鱼乡肉丝里加了些辣椒和花椒. 我想让它象我们的爱情那样火辣.不过我一定下不为例.”
“Look at this, it is really delicious. This time, I
guarantee you, it is not spicy.” I proudly pointed at the pig’s
feet braised in soy sauce, revelling in my own achievement. “Come
on, please try one!” I encouraged her, but terrified, she ran away.
“Darling, please don’t disappoint me! I‘ve spent three hours cooking
it!” Salivating myself, I tried to hold her back. She desperately
struggled, loudly protesting: “Horrible! I am afraid of your pig’s
feet. Anyhow there is absolutely nothing to eat apart from bone
and disgusting skin! Have mercy, please!”
“瞧瞧下一道菜,真香! 这次我保证它不辣.” 我指着红烧猪蹄,得意洋洋, 自我陶醉. “来来,尝尝这一块!”
我继续鼓励她.但夫人大惊失色,放下筷子就跑. “亲爱的, 你可不要辜负我的心意.那可是我整整花了三个小时才烧出来的!” 我一边拦她,一边忍不住吞清口水.夫人拼命挣扎并大声抗议:“真恐怖!
我怕你的猪蹄.况且猪蹄除了骨头就是那倒人胃口的皮,你到底叫我吃什么?请放我一马!”
Confrontation between Chinese food and Western food
中西餐对垒(二)
Unfortunately my Sichuan food turned out to be a fiasco.
During the whole week, my wife was full of complaints, saying that
my masterpiece had turned a gentle, quiet beauty into a toilet sprinter.
However my Sichuan style Chinese food made me extremely happy. During
the whole week, in the kitchen, I chewed the remaining pig’s ear
and feet with relish, swallowed with gusto the bean curd and the
Yuxiang pork thread. I enjoyed my spicy Sichuan food so much that
my face was covered with red spots and my stomach was burnt. Of
course, when I was devouring all these delicacies, my civilised
wife never showed up, reluctant to see the pig’s ear and feet and
admire her husband’s ravenous look.
真不幸, 我的四川特色菜在媳妇面前不战自败.整整一个星期,夫人怨声载道,说我的得意之作让她这位文静的美眉成为频频冲刺卫生间里的短跑运动员.但是我的中国大餐却幸福了我.
整个星期里,我天天在厨房里津津有味地龃嚼着猪耳朵和猪蹄,心花怒放地吞噬着麻婆豆腐和鱼香肉丝,吃得我满脸冒出红红的青春爱国豆,胃里翻江倒海.当然在我扫荡美味佳肴的时候,我那文明的夫人从不粉墨登场.她不愿意看见猪耳朵和猪蹄子,更不愿意观赏到大丈夫那狼吞虎咽样子.
From then on, I actively followed the supreme instruction
from Chairman Mao, who had illuminated my childhood, “eliminate
the false and retain the true, discard the dross and select the
essential”. I started to eliminate without mercy all those delicacies
appreciated by the Chinese such as viscera, the feet and wings of
chickens and ducks, the heads and tails of fish and, at the same
time, started to replace them by the meats preferred by the Western
bourgeois such as lamb, beef and chicken, thus following another
of Mao’s supreme instructions: “make foreign things serve China,
make the past serve the present.” Today my Sichuan food has “pacifically”
evolved into a Sino-French food, light, natural, good to look at
and it has been accepted by my wife and by my mother-in-law. After
having manipulated with their knives and forks for a whole week,
it happens that they suddenly recall my improved masterpiece, meatball,
stir-fried cabbage, sweet and sour spare ribs, rice. If I offer
it once a week, they will praise it with winsome smiles on their
faces; however, if I offer it twice a week, they will frown and
inwardly moan and groan; if I offer it three times a week, they
will glare at me, ready to explode; if I offer it four times a week,
they will wipe out their Chinese chef without mercy.
从此以后,我积极响应曾照亮我童年生活的毛老人家的最高指示:“去粗取精,去伪存真”,毫不客气地淘汰掉那些诸如内脏下水、鸡爪鸭爪、鸡翅鸭翅、鱼头鱼尾等中国人喜欢吃的美味佳肴,并同时遵循老人家的另一最高指示“洋为中用,古为今用”,代之以西方小资喜欢的羔羊肉、牛肉、鸡胸肉等“阳春白雪”.如今我的川菜已经“和平演变”成清淡、纯朴、美观的法式中餐,并逐渐为妻子和丈母娘所接受.她们在西餐桌上刀光剑影一个星期以后,往往也会突然想我改良后的拿手好菜:
川丸子汤、 清炒大白菜、糖醋排骨和白米饭.如果让她们每周享用一次,她们会笑逐颜开,赞不绝口; 但如果让她们每周享用两次,她们会眉头紧锁,暗暗叫苦;享用三次,她们会怒目而视,一触即发;享用四次,她们会毫不客气地把中国大厨扫地出门.
But let’s look at the other side of the coin. It also
happens that, as a guest of honour at the dining table, I am often
put in a very awkward position. French delicacies are good to look
at, but difficult to swallow. Green vegetables are eaten either
raw, or overcooked. Duck, chicken, fish are often cooked or roasted
without sauces. However the way to eat them is quite democratic:
you yourself season the cooked food with salt or pepper. What embarrasses
me most is that when I have difficulty to swallow my wife’s masterpiece,
she always looks at me full of tender affection and never stops
asking questions. “Is it good?” “Wonderful!” I automatically give
it the thumbs up. “A little bit more!” She shows loving care for
me and hastens to add more food on my plate until I eat myself sick.
Definitely her darling is fed like a Beijing duck!
但也来看看事情的另一面.作为夫人西餐桌上的坐上宾,中国大丈夫又何尝不是有苦难言. 夫人的法式“阳春白雪”看起来美观,吃起来难咽.
嫩嫩的青菜要么生吞活剥,要么煮成菜泥;鸡鸭鱼肉要么青煮,要么青烤.不过吃法还算民主,任君在原味熟食上撒盐撒胡椒面.最让我这位食客难堪的是每当我艰难地咽食夫人的大菜时,她总会含情默默地注视着夫君并频频提问:
“菜好吃吗?” “棒极了!”我总会机械地翘起大拇指称赞.“那就再来一点!”夫人关怀备至,赶紧在盘子里加食,直到我吃得撑死.她那亲爱的简直被当成北京烤鸭填喂!
Nevertheless, even though my quick and flattering answer
is always the same, its composition is totally different. My first
“wonderful” contains 127771476140f sincerity and 9927773676320f
encouragement, my thousandth one contains 400f sincerity and 600f
encouragement, and maybe my ten thousandth one will contain as much
as 900f sincerity and only 100f encouragement. Today I can calmly
cope with French food and also begin to enjoy its plain taste: vegetables
that keep their vegetable taste, meat that keep its meat shape,
the secondary ingredients such as condiments never over-powering
the primary raw material. I am in particular fascinated by my wife’s
French vegetable soup, which is simple and natural, tasty and refreshing,
able not only to fill my stomach, but also to warm my heart, just
like her never concealed love.
不过,尽管老公爽快的回答千篇一律,但里面的内涵却绝不雷同.我第一次说出的“棒极了”包含着百分之一的诚实,百分之九十九的鼓励;
第一千次“棒极了”却包含着百分之四十的诚实,百分之六十的鼓励.第一万次的“棒极了”可能就会包含百分之九十的诚实,百分之十的鼓励.如今,对妻子的法国大菜我已经基本上能够做到“坐怀不乱”,并开始慢慢品尝其独特的清淡味,
即菜有菜味,肉有肉型, 调料决不喧宾夺主.最让我醉心的是妻子的法式蔬菜汤,它朴实无华,清香可口,宛如妻子毫不掩饰的爱,即裹腹又甜心.
Due to their different histories, different cultures,
different physical geographies, Chinese food and French food are
also totally different, but both have their particularities and
charms. Neither of them is better or worse than the other, simply
they are not the same. If partners in a Sino-French family season
their daily food with “mutual understanding, compromise and love”,
it will certainly become the most delicious one in the world, whether
it is French or Chinese.
由于中法两国历史文化的差异、地理环境的不同,中餐和法餐自然也就迥然不同,但它们各具特色,各领风骚.两者无优劣之别、高贵之分,仅仅系不同菜肴而已.如果中法合资家庭的成员能够以互解、互谅、互爱为调料,那末无论是中餐还是法餐都一定能够成为人间亲情的美味佳肴.
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